The wine watches over you as you drink.
After getting off the rancid New Jersey Transit Train after a full ten-hour unpaid-internship day, I wanted nothing more than a modestly priced full-bodied bottle of red wine. The kind of red wine that puts hair on your chest and sits in your belly a way that I’ve only found with Scotch and Whiskey: warm and hard.
It was a Friday night and all that kept me from giving everything up and becoming just another bag lady with a bunch of cats living in New Jersey was this wine. This eye-catching, marked-down bottle of Honoro Vera saved my life.
Yes, $7.99 not only bought me a bottle of wine but $7.99 bought me a new beginning.
Cool bottle, bro.
Now for those of you who don’t appreciate wine can at the very least appreciate a bargain. At 14% alcohol content, when the average cheap wine is literally between 9.5% and 12%, Honoro is my hero.
Warning: You will have to air this wine out.
You can use one of these things:
Or you could apparently use one of these things:
Or you can just pop the cork and let it breathe.
However, I am obligated by my own conscience to let you know that this did happen:
Some might argue this is part of the marked-down-already-cheap-wine territory. I now owe one of my roommates a new wine opener but what price can you put on happiness? ($7.99)
And for those of you who can’t handle the sheer strength it takes to open this bottle of wine: phone a friend or chant a mantra. Mine was, “I am an independent woman!” but you can choose your own.
Also, before drinking this wine: I highly recommend not having just a salad for lunch prior to drinking a glass of this wine. You will be sorry for a number of reasons that your phone or your friends can tell you in the morning.
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